Lance’s Compendium of Smashable Monsters Day 4: Space Solider Birds
Imma be honest; IDK if aliens count in the monsterfucking critera. Also it’s probably space racist to call an alien a monster, so you know, keep that in mind. That being said, out of the selection given by Bioware’s Mass Effect the Turians are easily the most fuckable. They got meritocracy, a sick space navy, and their genetics make them unable to eat most human food, so you won’t have to worry about them eating your leftovers. Now according to the wiki, their talons and claws are capable of ripping flesh, so you’ll get some sick battlescars and also might die[two birds one stone]. Now Bioware are COWARDS who won’t show us the xeno-junk in the space trunk, I used my very effective and serious research method to discover what is going on downtown:
So it turns out that the consensus between the very scientifically minded people who discuss this very serious matter is that their junk is plated when not in use, who knew. I’m still down to clown tho
Given the turian religious notion of spirits that transcend the individual, often associated with military units, I’d think that Memorial Day would be a truly big event on the turian calendar. (Day of the Spirits, maybe?)
I’d also think that unless you’re the police, the fire brigade, or an EMT, you have the day off for commemorating the holiday. No giant mattress sales or pre-summer clearances; no place to grab a Starbucks; nowhere to fuel your car or get last minute groceries. Every turian takes this holiday very seriously, because every citizen is also a soldier.
Either ‘cargo’ style pants wide enough to be pulled over the leg spurs (wraparound like these or with small clasps from the knee down such as these) or if they’re tight leggings, they would have to be completely open from hem to waist and closed with little clasps such as kohaze, or maybe a hook and eye closure. A pain to get in and out of, but great to show off that slim body 😉
Garrus’ space stretch leggings are bollocks because apparently nobody at Bioware has any idea about patternmaking. (/saltiness)
Chapters: ½ Fandom: Mass Effect Trilogy Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Original Male Turian Character(s)/Original Male Turian Character(s) Characters: Original Male Turian Character(s), Ensign Leucen Delius, Xeriak ‘Imperious’ Garros Additional Tags: Light Dom/sub, Sexual Roleplay, Blowjobs, Deepthroating, Master/Servant, Inspired by Roleplay/Roleplay Adaptation, Anal Sex
Summary:
Xeriak gets his boyfriend Leucen to roleplay as Primarch and Servant, and persuades him to have a try at deepthroating…
Eyo friends and fam! Part one of the drabble prompt turned 10000+ words RP I wrote with @doragonkage. This was a lot of smutty fun for sure XD
Turian smut for everyone while we’re still allowed to write erotica on Tumblr! *shakes fist at sky*
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